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i can't help but feel that there's something terribly unromantic about this. like, what would frankenstein do when looking for love? better we should run into each other on the champs-elysees, but since i refuse to go to there until france acknowledges that the real name is "freedom lane" ...

my favorite book is moby dick. my favorite movie is the jerk. i think these things are utterly consistent. i taught hs spanish long enough to learn it myself, then went to law school. i worked for the doj and the aclu (mostly because i like acronyms), and despite hating to think that i may well be on the verge of becoming yet another lawyer who's "really a writer," no one's paying me to write, so ... I skate well enough to play hockey, but really, I just like shoving people into the boards. i meditate. i juice. I have a favorite cast iron skillet (cooking seems more manly when you can flip a tortilla in a 10 pound pan). i can speak in verse. i can build almost anything out of wood. i don't hunt, fish or play golf. i do pump my own gas and drive a stick. i think i'm a good kisser, but i can't be sure, since all most women care about is getting into my pants.

this for me is a curious experiment, a momentary lapse that is all the more likely because it's 3:00 a.m., when all sorts of odd things take on the sheen of normalcy (normality? normalness? normalrooney?), a slip from the real world into some surreality where it makes sense to use a computer to work, order meals, office supplies, substitute instant messages for chit chat with the people in the offices down the hall, and, finally, find love. personally, i prefer a slice of pizza on a park bench to a 60 sushi meal at my desk, and i prefer meeting women on boardwalks and boulevards to ... this - but what do i know? i'm still single, and the last couple of months you wouldn't believe how much sushi i've had ...

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i am looking for someone 25-30 who enjoys long walks on the beach, oprah’s book of the month selections, and the inspirational works of attorney general and rousing folk singer, john ashcroft.